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Case #7489593 – December 27th, 9:32 AM. Suspect is a brunette woman over thirty. She is filed in the Must Implement Liberal Frisking, or MILF category. She identifies herself as Silvia Saige. She is suspected of stealing a necklace, but attempts to leave the premises, claiming she has dinner plans. A strip search reveals that she is hiding the stolen goods in her bra. The rest of this case is classified.